RAW LIVE Coverage & Discussion Thread - 8th March 2010

[Kellie]

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RAW Results - 8th March 2010
Location - Portland
Announcers - Michael Cole & Jerry "The King" Lawler

We jump right into the thick of things with the Undertaker, and I bet he's going to talk about Shawn Michaels. The lights dim to Undertaker purple as the Undertaker says that last week was symbolic of what Shawn Michaels' life has become since becoming #17 in the Undertaker's Wrestlemania streak. HBK chant starts. Undertaker says that Shawn's life has a dark cloud hanging over him, and Shawn's obsession with ridding himself of that cloud will cost him the ultimate price: his career. Undertaker says what Shawn needs to understand is that after Wrestlemania, there will be no tomorrows, no celebrations, no sense of triumph, for Shawn there will be no victory, only the same dark cloud hovering over his head for the rest of his life. It brings the Undertaker no joy to say that in three weeks, Shawn's career will REST...IN...uh oh, Shawn Michaels' music hits and here he comes to confront the Undertaker. Shawn says that Undertaker hasn't earned the right to finish his line yet, and admits that Wrestlemania 25 has been hanging over his head like a dark cloud and last week he went to bed full of rage, but when he woke up the cloud was gone. He had an epiphany, because the reason he cost Undertaker the title at the Elimination Chamber was because he had no choice, but when Undertaker interfered last week, he didn't have to. Shawn says that for the first time in the Undertaker's heart, he experienced fear. Undertaker says that if he were Shawn, he'd choose his next words very carefully. Shawns responds by saying...FEAR! Because Undertaker's the only one who knows how close Shawn came to ending it all last year, and that's why he asked Shawn to put his career on the line, because he thought he'd intimidate Shawn into saying no, but he didn't. Shawn says he wouldn't risk everything if he didn't know he could beat Undertaker. Shawn says nobody lives a perfect life, nothing lasts forever, and at Wrestlemania, he's going to prove it. Undertaker says he can't tell if he's looking at a man who exudes confidence or if he's really looking at a man full of pitiful desperation. Shawn responds that he's not desperate, and that last year he would have taken a countout or anything that would have given him a victory, but not this year, and then he proposes that this year there's no countouts, no disqualifications, the match only ends by pinfall or submission, and that this year, he's going to kick Undertaker's teeth down his throat and beat him. Undertaker tells him it's a deal, and that Shawn has chosen his own demise. Undertaker says he can look in Shawn's eyes and see the fire, passion, and will, and can look into his soul and say that he sees that he honestly thinks he can beat Undertaker at Wrestlemania, and that's what makes him the Showstopper, the Main Eventer, and Mr Wrestlemania...but not this year. Undertaker tells Shawn that in his opinion, Shawn may be the greatest to ever step in the ring, but on March 28th, he will open up the gates of Hell and unleash a fury that no mortal man has ever seen to make sure that at Wrestlemania, Shawn's career is over. Shawn tells Undertaker to keep telling himself that, and that after Wrestlemania, the dark cloud is going to come back, but this time it'll be hanging over Undertaker, and the dark cloud is going to follow him everywhere he goes, and inside that dark cloud is going to be an image that will haunt him for the rest of his life, an image of Shawn Michaels ending the streak. Shawn walks off as the Undertaker is left standing, visibly perturbed, in the ring as Shawn turns and stares him down from the entrance ramp.

We're live in Portland three weeks away from Wrestlemania, and later on tonight Randy Orton takes on Dibiase & Rhodes in a handicap match, and Mr McMahon takes on John Cena!

Gail Kim, Eve Torres & Kelly Kelly vs Maryse, Katie Lea Burchill & Alicia Fox

Gail Kim and Alicia Fox start the match, Gail gets a side headlock takedown but Alicia fights her way out and whips Gail into the corner, but Alicia misses a charge and Gail gets a vertical drop to the back of Alicia's neck. Alicia tries another charge to the corner and eats elbow, but Alicia catches Gail with a kick coming out of the corner. Alicia tags out to Maryse who picks Gail up and gets a side backbreaker for 2. Maryse takes a shot at Kelly then gets up in Gail's face, but Gail smacks her in the mouth and tags out to Eve, who comes in with a trilogy of dropkicks, but Maryse goes to the eyes and whips Eve in for a backdrop, but Eve yanks Maryse down by the hair and gets a somersault senton for 2. Alicia and Katie come in, but Kelly and Gail come in with a pair of dropkicks to run them off. Maryse charges Eve in the corner and eats elbow, Eve goes up top and gets Rocky Romero's rolling Fujiwara armbar for the submission win!

Winners: Gail Kim, Eve Torres & Kelly Kelly


Backstage
We go backstage to guest host Criss Angel, who is hanging out with...you guessed it, Hornswoggle. In come the Bella Twins, who are big fans of Angel's Vegas show. They want to be part of his act, but he has no use for twins, and instead pulls a thread off of one of their sweaters, eats it, and pulls it out his eye. That is just disgusting. They follow this up with Jillian coming in also wanting to be part of Angel's act and she starts singing. He tells her to stops and hypnotizes her so that when she tries to sing, she can't! They should have had him on here months ago.


Backstage
We see Big Show and Miz walking backstage as we go to commercial.

We're back from commercial, and ShowMiz is on their way to the ring. Miz tells us that John Morrison & R-Truth earned the right to challenge for the Unified Tag Team Title at Wrestlemania, but not since Lex Luger and the British Bulldog have such a boring team gotten a shot at the tag team title, and they'd even rather face the Bushwhackers at Wrestlemania, at least they're an actual team. He says shame on the WWE Universe for not realizing what is standing in front of them, they are hot commodities because they are the last truly great tag team in WWE. This brings out Morrison and R-Truth for a non-title match.

Unified Tag Team Champions ShowMiz vs John Morrison & R-Truth

Truth and Miz start as Morrison baseball slides Show off the apron, and then Truth and Morrison double clothesline Miz over the top, then do a double baseball slide to Miz on the floor. Show comes over to try and grab them, but they ram him into the ringpost and DDT him on the floor as the referee calls for the bell. Truth and Morrison go back to working Miz over and give him a gourdbuster on the guardrail, then get in the ring where Morrison takes the mic and says that Miz says they're not a real team, but they just showed how real they are.

Winner: No Contest

Later tonight: Randy Orton takes on Ted Dibiase & Cody Rhodes, and Mr McMahon takes on John Cena!

We're back from commercial as we go to a recap package of the Cena-Batista feud, including some of Batista's awesome promo from last week and video of Batista breaking Cena's neck at Summerslam 2008. We go backstage to Josh Matthews, who is with John Cena. Cena admits that he's never beaten Batista, Batista has broken his neck, and taken his championship, and obviously has his number, and the only thing he can do is go out there and beat him. Josh asks him if he anticipates Batista getting involved, and Cens says he's counting on it.

Backstage
Evan Bourne is backstage thanking Criss Angel for his Money In The Bank qualifying match with William Regal tonight, but is interrupted by William Regal and Skip Sheffield, who come in and Skip asks Angel to perform a trick for him. Regal writes 56 on a piece of paper, Angel guesses it, and Skip tells Regal he owes him a Travis Tritt CD. I wonder how many people are going to buy Wrestlemania because of that segment.

We go back to Elimination Chamber to relive Ted Dibiase eliminating Randy Orton from the Elimination Chamber match, leading into our next match:

Handicap Match
Ted Dibiase & Cody Rhodes vs Randy Orton

Orton jumps Legacy from behind on their way down the ramp, then jumps in the ring and awaits them as we go to commercial.

We're back from commercial and the bells rings to start the match. Cody starts with Randy, and it looks like we're doing tag rules for this handicap match. Cody takes Randy to the corner and puts the boots to him, but Orton turns it around and goes to work on Cody, whipping him into the ropes and catching him with an elbow. Now, Legacy was able to beat Triple H 2-on-1 so it stands to reason they ought to be able to handle Orton...right? Dibiase tags in and lays in some rights to Orton, but Orton catches Dibiase coming off the ropes with a clothesline and Dibiase backs off. Legacy confers in the corner before Cody tags back in and takes a boot to the gut from Orton, who then whips Cody into the corner, but eats elbow on a charge and Dibiase gets a cheapshot on Orton from the outside. Rhodes lays in a couple of shots on Orton and goes for a cover, but only gets one. Orton backdrops Rhodes over the top and Dibiase tries to sneak in from behind, but Orton catches him and Dibiase hightails it to the floor and Orton stands alone in the ring as we go to commercial.

We're back from commercial as Orton is fighting his way out of Legacy's corner. Rhodes leapfrogs Orton but eats a clothesline, but Orton takes too much time and Rhodes gets a jawbreaker and tosses Orton to the floor where he loses a scuffle with Dibiase. The fact that Legacy hasn't won this match by now makes them look like such chumps. Rhodes goes to the floor and works Orton over and tosses him back in the ring as the crowd starts chanting for Orton. Tag out to Dibiase, who comes in and HITS THE CHINLOCK! Well, he did learn something from Orton after all. Orton fights his way out but Dibiase takes his head off with a stiff clothesline for 2. Dibiase takes Orton back to the Legacy corner and tags in Rhodes, who nails Orton with a beautiful dropkick for 2. Tag back out to Dibiase, who lays in several shots in the corner and chokes Orton with his boot. Dibiase and Rhodes both in now to double team Orton, but Orton fights his way out and has powerslams for both guys. Orton starts working Dibiase over in the corner and gets his pet neckbreaker, stops to admire the Wrestlemania sign, and starts slithering. Rhodes comes in from behind and grabs Orton, and Orton fights him off but Dibiase comes from behind and nails Dreamstreet for the (upset?) win.

Winners: Ted Dibiase & Cody Rhodes

After the match
Rhodes hits CrossRhodes after the match and Legacy stands tall doing the Randy Orton pose just to rub salt in the wound.

Backstage
We go backstage to Batista, as Josh Matthews asks him for his thoughts on John Cena expecting him to get involved in tonight's main event. Batista says Cena is paranoid and gives his word as WWE Champion that he will not get involved in his match tonight, and tells Josh that if he sees John, to tell him that he's pulling for him.

Later tonight: Mr McMahon takes on John Cena!

Triple H is walking backstage...and he looks determined!

We're back, and Triple H is on his way to the ring, spewing water on his way down the ramp and again on the ring apron. I wonder if he does that when he's not at work, like does he do that before dinner and before he goes in the grocery store? Before we hear what Mr H has to say, we take a look back at last week as Sheamus made a surprise return and beat the bejeesus out of Hunter. Back to the ring, as Triple H says he kind of respects Sheamus for what he did last week, because if he got his butt kicked by somebody who cost him his WWE Title and gave him a concussion, he'd want to kick his butt too. Way to put the young guys over, Hunter. Triple H is interrupted by Sheamus, who walks to the ring with a purpose and gets right in Hunter's face. Sheamus says he'll make a statement on Triple H at Wrestlemania if Triple H has the guts. Triple H says Sheamus has probably had the biggest first year of anyone in the business (wink wink), but he's never been to Wrestlemania, and until he's done that, his other accomplishments mean nothing. Triple H says he's been where Sheamus is now, and when he was young he jumped on the biggest star he could get at Wrestlemania, and he got crushed. I wonder whatever happened to that guy? But anyway, Triple H kept at it and became a big star and has fought all the stars at Wrestlemania, and the short list of guys who have beaten him at Wrestlemania have become superstars. But there's a much longer list of guys who have lost to him at Wrestlemania and dropped into a pit of obscurity. Triple H tells Sheamus it's a big gamble, and you have to risk it all for one shot at being immortal at Wrestlemania, or being nothing. Before Sheamus takes that gamble, he had better be sure. Sheamus considers for a moment, then starts to back up...then takes a swing at Hunter. A brawl ensues and Triple H clotheslines Sheamus over the top to the floor, but Sheamus drags him under the bottom rope and works him over on the floor. Triple H dodges the pump kick and dives onto Sheamus, and they both go over the rail. The brawl continues back to the ringside area and back into the ring where Triple H hits a spinebuster and sends Sheamus scurrying to the floor. Sheamus looks really mad as Triple H stares him down from the ring.

Backstage
We go to the back with Criss Angel, who is deep in conversation with Santino Marella, who talks about all his Italian relatives like Ralph Macchio who were there and then...POOF...disappeared. He name drops Harry Houdini, and Angel says that Houdini wasn't Italian, he was from Budapest. Then he takes out a knife and four cups and tells Santino to hide the knife under one of the cups and not tell Angel which one. Angel turns his back as Santino hides the knife as I wonder what the hell any of this has to do with wrestling. Of course Angel guesses the correct cup and then we go to commercial. See, why would we want wrestling when we can watch this for two hours?

After commercial, we see the Money In The Bank briefcase hanging over the ring as we go to another Money In The Bank qulaifier!

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match
Evan Bourne vs William Regal

I would love to see this match in ROH. Christian is at ringside with Heath Slater to observe while Regal is accompanied to the ring by Skip Sheffield. No problem with them getting a little NXT plug in there. Regal pounds away on Bourne to start with forearms, but Bourne comes back with some kicks and comes off the ropes but runs into an elbow by Regal. Regal with a second elbow and a butterfly suplex for 2. Regal with his slamplex thing and goes for the running knee, but Bourne catches him with a leg lariat and goes up top and hits Air Bourne for the win.

Winner: Evan Bourne

With this win, Evan Bourne joins Christian, MVP, Matt Hardy, Dolph Ziggler, Shelton Benjamin, Kane, and Jack Swagger in Money In The Bank at Wrestlemania, and celebrates by pointing at the Wrestlemania 26 banner.

Still to come tonight: Mr McMahon takes on John Cena.

We come back from commercial, and this week's Wrestlemania Recall is of...wow, it's Goldberg and Lesnar from Wrestlemania 20! There's something I never expected to see on WWE TV ever again. Speaking of Austin, he's guest hosting Raw next week!

We get a video package recapping the last few weeks of the Bret Hart-Vince McMahon feud, and then we see McMahon walking backstage, and he'll battle John Cena next!

We're back, and next week is not only going to see Steve Austin guest hosting, but it's also going to be Wrestlemania Rewind week as we'll see John Cena vs Big Show (Wrestlemania 20), Triple H vs Randy Orton (Wrestlemania 25), and Shawn Michaels vs Chris Jericho (Wrestlemania 19), as well as the official contract signing for the Bret Hart-Mr McMahon match!

Criss Angel finally makes his appearance in front of the crowd, as Michael Cole informs us that he's been named Magician Of The Decade for the last five years. That math doesn't quite add up. Criss Angel says he's honored to be here live on Raw and asks us if we're ready. Shouldn't he have asked that before the last fifteen minutes of the show? He hypes the crowd up for the main event and introduces the participants, first John Cena and then Mr McMahon, but before the match starts McMahon grabs the mic and says that he knows Bret is watching this in Calgary, and nothing against Criss Angel, but the result of this match will be no illusion, and by the way, this isn't just any match...it's a gauntlet handicap match! Vince motions to the back and out comes Vladimir Kozlov, who rushes the ring to start the main event.

Gauntlet Match
John Cena vs Mr McMahon And Company

Kozlov comes in and lays Cena right out with a powerslam, then gets a double overhook and rams headbutts into Cena's chest, then hits a big spinebuster and tags Vince in. Vince casually strolls over, salutes, and covers Cena...for 2. Vince motions to the back, and out comes Drew McIntyre, who mounts Cena and rains right hands down on Cena's face. McIntyre with a Flatliner and then tags Vince back in, and Vince shoots the half, hooks the leg...and gets 2 again. Vince motions to the back yet again, and now it's Jack Swagger...as we go to commercial.

We come back and Cena's somehow standing over Swagger, leading us to believe the tables somehow turned during the commercial break. Cena with the Five Knuckle Shuffle and goes for the Attitude Adjustment, but Swagger counters out, rams Cena into the corner, and powerslams him. Vince wants to tag in but Swagger waves him off and hits a running Vader Bomb out of the corner. Swagger says one more time, and nails another running Vader Bomb. Vince tags back in yet again as I wait for Batista to be the last guy to come out. Vince covers and gets 2, then covers him again and gets another 2. Vince motions to the back yet again, and this time it's Mark Henry, and it seems Cena's about to get his wig split. Henry palms Cena's head and gives him the World's Strongest Slam, then tags in Vince, who covers and gets another 2 count. Way to kill the finishers of everybody on your Raw roster! Vince goes to the floor and grabs the mic and ring bell, and declares this to now be a no disqualification handicap Gauntlet Match. Mark Henry tries to talk Vince out of nailing Cena with the ring bell, and Vince says no problem, then hands Henry the bell and tells him to hit Cena. Henry says no way and tosses the bell, then turns around into a spear from Batista. Now here come the reinforcements as Kofi Kingston comes out and attacks Batista, but Batista kills him with a Batista Bomb. Cena attacks Batista and takes him out with a clothesline before turning his attention to Vince. Vince backs off and drops the ring bell, Cena goes for the Attitude Adjustment but gets speared by Batista, Batista follows that up with the Batista Bomb and wouldn't you know it, that's enough for Vince to finally score the win over Cena. It was a sloppy cover, but at least he hooked the leg. Monsoon would be proud.

Winner: Vince McMahon

Batista stands over Cena and the lights go down as he raises his hands and screams in victory.

[LionDen]

Let the war begin .......... WOOT!

[CarnivoreJ]

First time I've wanted to turn TNA off this crap with the Beautiful People...Worthless and stupid. The match was at least passable.

[Kenpachi Zaraki]

Criss Angel is epic