the madscotsman
06-08-2006, 04:43 PM
My jokes are usually sick don't be offended it's only a fucking joke-
Mommy, Mommy! What happened to all that dog food Fido wouldn't eat?
Shut up and eat your meat loaf.
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Mommy, Mommy! When are we going to have Aunt Edna for dinner?
Shut up, we haven't even finished your Grandmother yet.
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Mommy, Mommy! I hate my sister's guts.
Shut up and eat what's put in front of you.
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Mommy, Mommy! What is a deliquent child?
Shut up, light your cigarette, drink your whisky and deal those cards.
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Mommy, Mommy! What is a deliquent child?
Shut up and pass me the crowbar.
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Q: What do you call a blonde with a brand new PC?
A: A dumb terminal.
Q: Why are blonde jokes so easy to understand?
A: So brunettes can understand them.
Q: How did the blond burn her ear?
A: The phone rang while she was ironing.
Q: There are 17 blonds standing outside a disco but why couldn't they get in?
A: The sign said "must be 18 to enter".
Q: Why are there no brunette jokes?
A: Because blondes would have to think them up.
Q: How does a blonde make instant pudding?
A: She places the box in the microwave and looks for the "instant pudding setting" button.
Q: Did you hear about the blonde that went to library and checked out a book called "How to Hug"?
A: When she got back to the dorm and found out it was volume seven of the encyclopedia.
Q: What do you call 24 blondes in a cardboard box?
A: A case of empties.
Mommy, Mommy! What happened to all that dog food Fido wouldn't eat?
Shut up and eat your meat loaf.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Mommy, Mommy! When are we going to have Aunt Edna for dinner?
Shut up, we haven't even finished your Grandmother yet.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Mommy, Mommy! I hate my sister's guts.
Shut up and eat what's put in front of you.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Mommy, Mommy! What is a deliquent child?
Shut up, light your cigarette, drink your whisky and deal those cards.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Mommy, Mommy! What is a deliquent child?
Shut up and pass me the crowbar.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: What do you call a blonde with a brand new PC?
A: A dumb terminal.
Q: Why are blonde jokes so easy to understand?
A: So brunettes can understand them.
Q: How did the blond burn her ear?
A: The phone rang while she was ironing.
Q: There are 17 blonds standing outside a disco but why couldn't they get in?
A: The sign said "must be 18 to enter".
Q: Why are there no brunette jokes?
A: Because blondes would have to think them up.
Q: How does a blonde make instant pudding?
A: She places the box in the microwave and looks for the "instant pudding setting" button.
Q: Did you hear about the blonde that went to library and checked out a book called "How to Hug"?
A: When she got back to the dorm and found out it was volume seven of the encyclopedia.
Q: What do you call 24 blondes in a cardboard box?
A: A case of empties.