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05-25-2009, 09:23 AM
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Please feel free to discuss RAW here. No need to wait for updates!
RAW Results - 25th May 2009
Location - Los Angeles, California
Announcers - Michael Cole & Jerry "The King" Lawler
Tonight’s show starts off with a tribute to those people who sacrificed their lives for our freedom.
We are live from Los Angeles, California and your announcers are Jim ‘Dan Issel’ Ross and Michael ‘Fat Lever’ Cole.
It is time for the insanity to begin as ‘E. Stan Kroenke’ comes to the ring. We see the footage from the coverage of the issues between Raw and the NBA playoffs on the same night.
‘Stan’ sees ‘Jack Nicholson’, ‘David Stern’, and ‘Jerry Buss’ in the front row. Stan introduces himself to the Los Angeles crowd and they are not big fans of his. He says that he cannot stand the WWE or its fans. He says that he does not care about screwing thousands of WWE fans and calls them ‘you people’. He points out that he is a billionaire. He says that he has been made fun of by the WWE, the media, and everyone in Los Angeles. We see the graphic that has been all over WWE television this week where he is depicted as the devil. Stan says that he is no devil and Vince is no angel.
Cue the music and Vince does his walk to the ring. Vince takes the mic while ‘Stan’ backs off. Vince says that he is announcing the formation of a new basketball league. It will be called the XBA. Vince says the league will be a total miserable failure. That is because he will have ‘Stan’ and his staff run it. Vince tells ‘Stan’ that this did not have to happen. Vince tells ‘Stan’ that he could have said that he screwed up and did not expect to have a team in the playoffs. Vince says that they are going to have fun. Vince comments on Stan’s name. He says that he does not trust anyone with an initial as a first name. Vince says that he thinks he knows what the ‘E’ stands for. Vince says that it stands for Enos. Vince says that Enos rhymes with some words and mentions Venus. Vince says that it also rhymes with genius, but that isn’t the case with him. Vince says that ‘Stan’ has Enos envy. Vince says that ‘Stan’ disrespects WWE fans. Vince says that ‘Stan’ cannot push around the WWE Universe because they push back, and Vince pushes ‘Stan’.
The Miz comes out and he says that he does not want to come out to interrupt Vince. He has something important to say to the WWE fans. Miz says that he became a huge television star in Los Angeles, the home of the Lakers. Miz says that everyone in the building thinks they are going to be the NBA Champions. Miz says that he is from the city where the future NBA Champions reside. Miz reveals a Cavaliers’ jersey and says that he is from Cleveland. Miz says that the Cavs are down 2 games to 1 but they will overcome the odds because they are awesome. He says that Cena is an overrated phony poseur, just like Kobe Bryant. Miz says that he will run John Cena out of this town just like Kobe ran out Shaq. It will be more painful than Magic Johnson’s talk show. Miz says that he will make it 6-0 against John Cena.
John Cena comes out and he is attacked from behind by Ted DiBiase and Cody Rhodes. Batista comes out to help Cena and Batista with a round of spinebusters. Big Show comes to the ring and he attacks Cena and Batista. Jerry Lawler comes out in Lakers colors and he punches Show. Show with a head butt and Lawler goes down. Cena and Batista clothesline Show over the top rope to the floor.
Backstage
Kelly Kelly is stretching in the back and then she walks in split screen with Maryse as we go to commercial.
We are back with the WWE Rewind: Kelly Kelly getting her title match by winning a battle royal.
Divas Title Match
Kelly Kelly vs Maryse
Maryse does her pose for no reason before they lock up and then Kelly mocks her. Maryse with a spear and then she punches Kelly. Maryse with an uranage back breaker for a near fall. Maryse slams Kelly’s head into the mat and then she yells at her. Maryse tells off the referee before returning to Kelly. Maryse with a punch to the back of the head. Kelly with an Irish whip and a splash in the corner. Kelly with a clothesline followed by an Irish whip. Kelly with a handspring back elbow and drop kick for a near fall. Kelly punches Maryse and then they roll around the ring. Maryse goes out of the ring and Kelly follows. Kelly is sent onto the announce table and then Maryse pushes Kelly over the announce table as Maryse returns to the ring, but the referee has disqualified Maryse.
Winner: Kelly Kelly
After the match
Kelly attacks Maryse in the ring but Maryse leaves the ring.
We go to commercial.
Backstage
We are back and the Bellas are walking with ‘Jack Nicholson’. Goldust is there and he says that he is a big fan. Hornswoggle jumps into the scene. Goldust was hoping for some acting lessons because they have a scene to do for him. They do the courtroom scene from A Few Good Men and it looks like Hornswoggle learned some new words and Goldust’s Tourette’s might be coming back.
We go to footage from last week when Ric Flair told Randy Orton that he would be facing Batista again at the next big pay per view and they will be inside a steel cage.
Ric Flair and Batista are in the locker room. Flair says that he is going to call out Randy Orton tonight because he is Ric Flair. Batista wonders if it has to be tonight. Batista says that he has Orton in a cage in two weeks. Batista wants Flair to wait until after the cage match to call him out. Flair says that he can handle himself. Flair is going to walk out tonight and call out Orton. He tells Batista if he does not want to see it, don’t watch it.
We go to commercial.
We are back and Did you Know that a lot more people watch Raw than any other show on cable on Mondays
Number One Contenders Match for the United States Title
Matt Hardy vs William Regal vs Kofi Kingston
Kofi kicks Hardy and then Regal goes after Kofi. Regal with knees to Kofi while Hardy is on the floor. Regal with a punch to Kofi followed by an Irish whip and a forearm for a near fall. Regal with an uppercut and then he tries to throw Kofi out of the ring but he bounces off the ropes and then hits a monkey flip. Kofi does laps around Regal and then he is grabbed by Hardy on the floor. Regal and Kofi with clotheslines and Hardy tries for near falls on both men. Hardy with a hard Irish whip and then he sends Kofi into the turnbuckles.
Montel Vontavious Porter comes to the ring to watch as we go to commercial.
We are back and Regal has Kofi in a full nelson and then Regal hits a half nelson suplex. Hardy stops a cover with a sunset flip for a near fall. Regal works on Hardy’s injured wrist. Kofi with a shoulder to Regal from the apron and then he tries for a sunset flip but Regal stays up. Hardy throws Regal out of the ring. Hardy with a neck breaker to Kofi. Regal with a chin lock and arm bar. Regal and Kofi exchange forearms and Regal with a side head lock. Hardy with a clothesline in the corner followed by a punch to Kofi. Regal works on Hardy’s wrist again. Kofi with an Irish whip and then he is sent to the apron. Kofi goes up top and hits a missile drop kick for a near fall but Hardy stops the cover. Kofi with a stunner and chops followed by a drop kick. Kofi with a leaping clothesline and then it is time for the Boop Boop Leg Drop for a near fall. Kofi with the leap into the corner for punches but Regal pulls Kofi off and hits an Exploder Suplex on Kofi. Hardy with a Side Effect to Regal for a near fall. Hardy with a Side Effect to Regal for a near fall. Regal counters the Twist of Fate with a belly-to-back suplex. Regal pulls down the knee pad but Kofi with Trouble in Paradise but Hardy breaks up the cover. Hardy misses with the cast but Hardy falls victim to Trouble in Paradise for the three count.
Winner: Kofi Kingston
After the match
Kofi goes to the announce table and goes to Montel Vontavious Porter and Porter says that he is looking forward to facing Kofi next week for the title.
Ric Flair is walking as we go to commercial.
We are back with the Slam of the Week: Last week’s handicap match that was won by the team with the disadvantage.
Ric Flair comes to the ring. Flair points out that Randy Orton sucker punched him and had his way with him. Flair says that all he could think about was what Jericho did to him and that is not going to happen again. Flair was thinking that he is a sixteen time World Champion. Randy Orton is the current World Champion. He wants Orton to try to beat him up and do it to his face. Flair takes off his jacket and he wants Orton to come to the ring.
Randy Orton comes out very methodically and he has a mic with him. Orton asks Flair what he thinks will happen if they get in the ring and fight. Orton says that he would love to fight Flair and beat him down on principle alone. He cannot do it because he lowered himself to punching a sixty year old man. Flair says that he wants Orton to do it again. Orton and Flair talk over each other. Orton says that it is over for him and it has been over for him. Six years ago, it was over for Flair in Evolution. Triple H kept Flair around because he felt sorry for Flair. Orton says that he is starting to feel sorry for Flair and so are the fans. Orton tells Flair that it is over.
Orton gets face to face with Flair and he says that it is over. Flair slaps Orton and then Orton punches Flair and Orton leaves the ring when he sees Batista coming to the ring. Batista has to hold Flair back. Orton tells Batista to waste his time watching after Flair. After he gets done with Batista at Extreme Rules, Batista will be just like Flair because it will be all over for him.
Ken Kennedy’s music plays and he comes out. The microphone comes down from the ceiling. Kennedy says that Orton looks a bit surprised. He asks Randy if he thought it was over because it is just getting started. It is just the beginning. Tonight is the official return of a man who will very shortly be the WWE Champion as well as the final man in the main event. That man happens to be Mr. Kennedy.
We go to commercial.
Santino Marella and Mickie James vs Chavo Guerrero and Beth Phoenix
Chavo attacks Santino as the bell rings and he connects with a Latino uppercut. Chavo with a Saito suplex for a near fall. Chavo chokes Santino in the ropes. Chavo punches Santino in the corner and then Beth chokes and punches Santino while Chavo distracted the referee. Beth tags in and Santino gets out of the ring. Mickie with a forearm to Beth followed by a drop kick for a near fall that is broken up by Chavo. Chavo charges at Santino and Santino moves and Chavo goes to the floor. Mickie with a crucifix for the three count.
Winners: Mickie James and Santino Marella
After groping Mickie after the win, Santino gets the mic but Vickie Guerrero comes out and excuses herself a few times as she waves regally. Vickie congratulates Santino on his victory, but she tells him that she will not be worried because Chavo will be in her corner. Santino says that he has a number of match ideas in his head. He says that he will choose a hog pen match.
Backstage
The Miz sees Big Show in the hall and Big Show tells Miz that he does not like him and nobody likes him. Show says that he does not have any problem with Miz being in the ring with John Cena, but he will not be pinning John Cena. Show says that nobody will be pinning John Cena. He will make John Cena tap out tonight. Show walks away and Miz asks rhetorically if it was just like at Judgment Day. Show asks Miz if he said anything and Miz says that he didn’t say anything.
We go to commercial.
We are back and we go to an Earlier Tonight Moment when Vince McMahon uttered the three letters we wanted to hear ‘XBA’.
The Colons are at the announce table to join Cole and Ross. We see footage from the Colons’ victory over The Brian Kendrick and Goldust.
Goldust and Hornswoggle vs The Brian Kendrick and Festus
Festus comes to the ring in a Clippers jersey.
The bell rings and Festus goes after Goldust and Hornswoggle tags himself in. Festus is confused by Hornswoggle’s size. Hornswoggle with a baseball slide to Kendrick. Kendrick wants to be tagged in and he tosses Hornswoggle around and gets a near fall with an inside cradle. Kendrick kicks Hornswoggle but Hornswoggle with a DDT and Goldust is tagged in. Goldust with a clothesline and a reverse atomic drop and clothesline. Goldust with a drop down uppercut. Kendrick with a drop kick and Festus refuses the tag and Kendrick slaps him. Goldust with a power slam and Hornswoggle with a frog splash and Goldust hits the Final Cut for the three count.
Winners: Goldust and Hornswoggle
After the match
Kendrick yells at the catatonic Festus and then he brings in a chair. Primo gets up and he rings the bell before Kendrick can use the chair. Kendrick leaves the ring before Festus can get him.
We go to commercial.
We are back and it is time for Jim Ross and Michael Cole to talk about the Extreme Rules pay per view.
We have the Lakers’ PA Announcer and it is time for the announcements of the Nuggets (Heels). They are followed by the Lakers (faces)
The Miz, Cody Rhodes, Ted DiBiase, Big Show, and Randy Orton vs John Cena, Montel Vontavious Porter, Ken Kennedy, Batista, and Jerry Lawler
Lawler and Rhodes start things off and they lock up and Lawler with a punch and a slam. Batista is tagged in and he sends Rhodes into the corner and connects with shoulders and a clothesline followed by another shoulder. Batista with a snap mare and a running boot to the head. Porter is tagged in and he punches Rhodes. Porter sends Rhodes into the turnbuckles and then he punches Rhodes. Rhodes with a kick and then he hits a clothesline and then he tags in DiBiase who kicks Porter and punches him. DiBiase with a kick and Porter with a back body drop but Orton made the blind tag and Orton hits a back breaker. Show with a clothesline on the floor as the referee was distracted. Orton with a near fall as we go to commercial.
We are back and DiBiase with a reverse chin lock on Porter. Porter with a jawbreaker and Miz stops Porter from making the tag. Miz with a kick and a rear chin lock. Porter punches Miz but Miz with a knee. Porter with an overhead belly-to-belly throw and both men are down. Porter tags in Kennedy and he punches Miz. Kennedy with a clothesline. Kennedy with a kick to Miz in the corner and then he hits a roundhouse kick for a near fall after missing a kick a few seconds earlier. Rhodes and DiBiase pull Kennedy out of the ring and they send Kennedy into the ringside barrier. Miz gets a near fall on Kennedy. Orton tags in and he punches Kennedy. Orton with a kick to the ribs and then he stomps on Kennedy’s abdomen. Orton with a knee to Kennedy’s head. Show tags in and he kicks Kennedy in the chest. Show with a head butt to Kennedy followed by a slam and elbow drop for a near fall. Show with a forearm to the back and a chop to the chest.
Rhodes tags in and he kicks and punches Kennedy. DiBiase is tagged in and he kicks Kennedy in the chest. DiBiase with a punch and then he tags Rhodes back in. Kennedy gets double teamed by DiBiase and Rhodes and then Rhodes gets a near fall. Miz tags in and he kicks Kennedy and follows that with a leg drop. Miz with a reverse chin lock. Kennedy punches Miz but Miz backs Kennedy into his corner and DiBiase is tagged back in. DIBiase with punches and knees followed by a near fall. DiBiase asks who wants Kennedy and Orton tags in. DiBiase holds Kennedy for Orton and Orton gets a near fall. Orton with a reverse chin lock. Orton with a drop kick to Kennedy for a near fall but Batista breaks up the cover. Kennedy with a belly-to-back suplex and both men are down.
Rhodes and Cena tag in and Cena with the flying shoulder tackles and then he hits the Blue Thunder Bomb. Porter tags in and it is time for a double barreled Five Knuckle Shuffle and Ballin Elbow. Lawler with a vintage punch to Miz. Porter with the Playmaker on Rhodes for the three count.
Winners: John Cena, Montel Vontavious Porter, Ken Kennedy, Batista, and Jerry Lawler
After the match
DiBiase hits the Million Dollar Dream Slam on Porter. Kennedy with the Mic Check to DiBiase. Orton with an RKO to Kennedy. Show and Batista with a double suplex to Show. We go to credits.
Please feel free to discuss RAW here. No need to wait for updates!
RAW Results - 25th May 2009
Location - Los Angeles, California
Announcers - Michael Cole & Jerry "The King" Lawler
Tonight’s show starts off with a tribute to those people who sacrificed their lives for our freedom.
We are live from Los Angeles, California and your announcers are Jim ‘Dan Issel’ Ross and Michael ‘Fat Lever’ Cole.
It is time for the insanity to begin as ‘E. Stan Kroenke’ comes to the ring. We see the footage from the coverage of the issues between Raw and the NBA playoffs on the same night.
‘Stan’ sees ‘Jack Nicholson’, ‘David Stern’, and ‘Jerry Buss’ in the front row. Stan introduces himself to the Los Angeles crowd and they are not big fans of his. He says that he cannot stand the WWE or its fans. He says that he does not care about screwing thousands of WWE fans and calls them ‘you people’. He points out that he is a billionaire. He says that he has been made fun of by the WWE, the media, and everyone in Los Angeles. We see the graphic that has been all over WWE television this week where he is depicted as the devil. Stan says that he is no devil and Vince is no angel.
Cue the music and Vince does his walk to the ring. Vince takes the mic while ‘Stan’ backs off. Vince says that he is announcing the formation of a new basketball league. It will be called the XBA. Vince says the league will be a total miserable failure. That is because he will have ‘Stan’ and his staff run it. Vince tells ‘Stan’ that this did not have to happen. Vince tells ‘Stan’ that he could have said that he screwed up and did not expect to have a team in the playoffs. Vince says that they are going to have fun. Vince comments on Stan’s name. He says that he does not trust anyone with an initial as a first name. Vince says that he thinks he knows what the ‘E’ stands for. Vince says that it stands for Enos. Vince says that Enos rhymes with some words and mentions Venus. Vince says that it also rhymes with genius, but that isn’t the case with him. Vince says that ‘Stan’ has Enos envy. Vince says that ‘Stan’ disrespects WWE fans. Vince says that ‘Stan’ cannot push around the WWE Universe because they push back, and Vince pushes ‘Stan’.
The Miz comes out and he says that he does not want to come out to interrupt Vince. He has something important to say to the WWE fans. Miz says that he became a huge television star in Los Angeles, the home of the Lakers. Miz says that everyone in the building thinks they are going to be the NBA Champions. Miz says that he is from the city where the future NBA Champions reside. Miz reveals a Cavaliers’ jersey and says that he is from Cleveland. Miz says that the Cavs are down 2 games to 1 but they will overcome the odds because they are awesome. He says that Cena is an overrated phony poseur, just like Kobe Bryant. Miz says that he will run John Cena out of this town just like Kobe ran out Shaq. It will be more painful than Magic Johnson’s talk show. Miz says that he will make it 6-0 against John Cena.
John Cena comes out and he is attacked from behind by Ted DiBiase and Cody Rhodes. Batista comes out to help Cena and Batista with a round of spinebusters. Big Show comes to the ring and he attacks Cena and Batista. Jerry Lawler comes out in Lakers colors and he punches Show. Show with a head butt and Lawler goes down. Cena and Batista clothesline Show over the top rope to the floor.
Backstage
Kelly Kelly is stretching in the back and then she walks in split screen with Maryse as we go to commercial.
We are back with the WWE Rewind: Kelly Kelly getting her title match by winning a battle royal.
Divas Title Match
Kelly Kelly vs Maryse
Maryse does her pose for no reason before they lock up and then Kelly mocks her. Maryse with a spear and then she punches Kelly. Maryse with an uranage back breaker for a near fall. Maryse slams Kelly’s head into the mat and then she yells at her. Maryse tells off the referee before returning to Kelly. Maryse with a punch to the back of the head. Kelly with an Irish whip and a splash in the corner. Kelly with a clothesline followed by an Irish whip. Kelly with a handspring back elbow and drop kick for a near fall. Kelly punches Maryse and then they roll around the ring. Maryse goes out of the ring and Kelly follows. Kelly is sent onto the announce table and then Maryse pushes Kelly over the announce table as Maryse returns to the ring, but the referee has disqualified Maryse.
Winner: Kelly Kelly
After the match
Kelly attacks Maryse in the ring but Maryse leaves the ring.
We go to commercial.
Backstage
We are back and the Bellas are walking with ‘Jack Nicholson’. Goldust is there and he says that he is a big fan. Hornswoggle jumps into the scene. Goldust was hoping for some acting lessons because they have a scene to do for him. They do the courtroom scene from A Few Good Men and it looks like Hornswoggle learned some new words and Goldust’s Tourette’s might be coming back.
We go to footage from last week when Ric Flair told Randy Orton that he would be facing Batista again at the next big pay per view and they will be inside a steel cage.
Ric Flair and Batista are in the locker room. Flair says that he is going to call out Randy Orton tonight because he is Ric Flair. Batista wonders if it has to be tonight. Batista says that he has Orton in a cage in two weeks. Batista wants Flair to wait until after the cage match to call him out. Flair says that he can handle himself. Flair is going to walk out tonight and call out Orton. He tells Batista if he does not want to see it, don’t watch it.
We go to commercial.
We are back and Did you Know that a lot more people watch Raw than any other show on cable on Mondays
Number One Contenders Match for the United States Title
Matt Hardy vs William Regal vs Kofi Kingston
Kofi kicks Hardy and then Regal goes after Kofi. Regal with knees to Kofi while Hardy is on the floor. Regal with a punch to Kofi followed by an Irish whip and a forearm for a near fall. Regal with an uppercut and then he tries to throw Kofi out of the ring but he bounces off the ropes and then hits a monkey flip. Kofi does laps around Regal and then he is grabbed by Hardy on the floor. Regal and Kofi with clotheslines and Hardy tries for near falls on both men. Hardy with a hard Irish whip and then he sends Kofi into the turnbuckles.
Montel Vontavious Porter comes to the ring to watch as we go to commercial.
We are back and Regal has Kofi in a full nelson and then Regal hits a half nelson suplex. Hardy stops a cover with a sunset flip for a near fall. Regal works on Hardy’s injured wrist. Kofi with a shoulder to Regal from the apron and then he tries for a sunset flip but Regal stays up. Hardy throws Regal out of the ring. Hardy with a neck breaker to Kofi. Regal with a chin lock and arm bar. Regal and Kofi exchange forearms and Regal with a side head lock. Hardy with a clothesline in the corner followed by a punch to Kofi. Regal works on Hardy’s wrist again. Kofi with an Irish whip and then he is sent to the apron. Kofi goes up top and hits a missile drop kick for a near fall but Hardy stops the cover. Kofi with a stunner and chops followed by a drop kick. Kofi with a leaping clothesline and then it is time for the Boop Boop Leg Drop for a near fall. Kofi with the leap into the corner for punches but Regal pulls Kofi off and hits an Exploder Suplex on Kofi. Hardy with a Side Effect to Regal for a near fall. Hardy with a Side Effect to Regal for a near fall. Regal counters the Twist of Fate with a belly-to-back suplex. Regal pulls down the knee pad but Kofi with Trouble in Paradise but Hardy breaks up the cover. Hardy misses with the cast but Hardy falls victim to Trouble in Paradise for the three count.
Winner: Kofi Kingston
After the match
Kofi goes to the announce table and goes to Montel Vontavious Porter and Porter says that he is looking forward to facing Kofi next week for the title.
Ric Flair is walking as we go to commercial.
We are back with the Slam of the Week: Last week’s handicap match that was won by the team with the disadvantage.
Ric Flair comes to the ring. Flair points out that Randy Orton sucker punched him and had his way with him. Flair says that all he could think about was what Jericho did to him and that is not going to happen again. Flair was thinking that he is a sixteen time World Champion. Randy Orton is the current World Champion. He wants Orton to try to beat him up and do it to his face. Flair takes off his jacket and he wants Orton to come to the ring.
Randy Orton comes out very methodically and he has a mic with him. Orton asks Flair what he thinks will happen if they get in the ring and fight. Orton says that he would love to fight Flair and beat him down on principle alone. He cannot do it because he lowered himself to punching a sixty year old man. Flair says that he wants Orton to do it again. Orton and Flair talk over each other. Orton says that it is over for him and it has been over for him. Six years ago, it was over for Flair in Evolution. Triple H kept Flair around because he felt sorry for Flair. Orton says that he is starting to feel sorry for Flair and so are the fans. Orton tells Flair that it is over.
Orton gets face to face with Flair and he says that it is over. Flair slaps Orton and then Orton punches Flair and Orton leaves the ring when he sees Batista coming to the ring. Batista has to hold Flair back. Orton tells Batista to waste his time watching after Flair. After he gets done with Batista at Extreme Rules, Batista will be just like Flair because it will be all over for him.
Ken Kennedy’s music plays and he comes out. The microphone comes down from the ceiling. Kennedy says that Orton looks a bit surprised. He asks Randy if he thought it was over because it is just getting started. It is just the beginning. Tonight is the official return of a man who will very shortly be the WWE Champion as well as the final man in the main event. That man happens to be Mr. Kennedy.
We go to commercial.
Santino Marella and Mickie James vs Chavo Guerrero and Beth Phoenix
Chavo attacks Santino as the bell rings and he connects with a Latino uppercut. Chavo with a Saito suplex for a near fall. Chavo chokes Santino in the ropes. Chavo punches Santino in the corner and then Beth chokes and punches Santino while Chavo distracted the referee. Beth tags in and Santino gets out of the ring. Mickie with a forearm to Beth followed by a drop kick for a near fall that is broken up by Chavo. Chavo charges at Santino and Santino moves and Chavo goes to the floor. Mickie with a crucifix for the three count.
Winners: Mickie James and Santino Marella
After groping Mickie after the win, Santino gets the mic but Vickie Guerrero comes out and excuses herself a few times as she waves regally. Vickie congratulates Santino on his victory, but she tells him that she will not be worried because Chavo will be in her corner. Santino says that he has a number of match ideas in his head. He says that he will choose a hog pen match.
Backstage
The Miz sees Big Show in the hall and Big Show tells Miz that he does not like him and nobody likes him. Show says that he does not have any problem with Miz being in the ring with John Cena, but he will not be pinning John Cena. Show says that nobody will be pinning John Cena. He will make John Cena tap out tonight. Show walks away and Miz asks rhetorically if it was just like at Judgment Day. Show asks Miz if he said anything and Miz says that he didn’t say anything.
We go to commercial.
We are back and we go to an Earlier Tonight Moment when Vince McMahon uttered the three letters we wanted to hear ‘XBA’.
The Colons are at the announce table to join Cole and Ross. We see footage from the Colons’ victory over The Brian Kendrick and Goldust.
Goldust and Hornswoggle vs The Brian Kendrick and Festus
Festus comes to the ring in a Clippers jersey.
The bell rings and Festus goes after Goldust and Hornswoggle tags himself in. Festus is confused by Hornswoggle’s size. Hornswoggle with a baseball slide to Kendrick. Kendrick wants to be tagged in and he tosses Hornswoggle around and gets a near fall with an inside cradle. Kendrick kicks Hornswoggle but Hornswoggle with a DDT and Goldust is tagged in. Goldust with a clothesline and a reverse atomic drop and clothesline. Goldust with a drop down uppercut. Kendrick with a drop kick and Festus refuses the tag and Kendrick slaps him. Goldust with a power slam and Hornswoggle with a frog splash and Goldust hits the Final Cut for the three count.
Winners: Goldust and Hornswoggle
After the match
Kendrick yells at the catatonic Festus and then he brings in a chair. Primo gets up and he rings the bell before Kendrick can use the chair. Kendrick leaves the ring before Festus can get him.
We go to commercial.
We are back and it is time for Jim Ross and Michael Cole to talk about the Extreme Rules pay per view.
We have the Lakers’ PA Announcer and it is time for the announcements of the Nuggets (Heels). They are followed by the Lakers (faces)
The Miz, Cody Rhodes, Ted DiBiase, Big Show, and Randy Orton vs John Cena, Montel Vontavious Porter, Ken Kennedy, Batista, and Jerry Lawler
Lawler and Rhodes start things off and they lock up and Lawler with a punch and a slam. Batista is tagged in and he sends Rhodes into the corner and connects with shoulders and a clothesline followed by another shoulder. Batista with a snap mare and a running boot to the head. Porter is tagged in and he punches Rhodes. Porter sends Rhodes into the turnbuckles and then he punches Rhodes. Rhodes with a kick and then he hits a clothesline and then he tags in DiBiase who kicks Porter and punches him. DiBiase with a kick and Porter with a back body drop but Orton made the blind tag and Orton hits a back breaker. Show with a clothesline on the floor as the referee was distracted. Orton with a near fall as we go to commercial.
We are back and DiBiase with a reverse chin lock on Porter. Porter with a jawbreaker and Miz stops Porter from making the tag. Miz with a kick and a rear chin lock. Porter punches Miz but Miz with a knee. Porter with an overhead belly-to-belly throw and both men are down. Porter tags in Kennedy and he punches Miz. Kennedy with a clothesline. Kennedy with a kick to Miz in the corner and then he hits a roundhouse kick for a near fall after missing a kick a few seconds earlier. Rhodes and DiBiase pull Kennedy out of the ring and they send Kennedy into the ringside barrier. Miz gets a near fall on Kennedy. Orton tags in and he punches Kennedy. Orton with a kick to the ribs and then he stomps on Kennedy’s abdomen. Orton with a knee to Kennedy’s head. Show tags in and he kicks Kennedy in the chest. Show with a head butt to Kennedy followed by a slam and elbow drop for a near fall. Show with a forearm to the back and a chop to the chest.
Rhodes tags in and he kicks and punches Kennedy. DiBiase is tagged in and he kicks Kennedy in the chest. DiBiase with a punch and then he tags Rhodes back in. Kennedy gets double teamed by DiBiase and Rhodes and then Rhodes gets a near fall. Miz tags in and he kicks Kennedy and follows that with a leg drop. Miz with a reverse chin lock. Kennedy punches Miz but Miz backs Kennedy into his corner and DiBiase is tagged back in. DIBiase with punches and knees followed by a near fall. DiBiase asks who wants Kennedy and Orton tags in. DiBiase holds Kennedy for Orton and Orton gets a near fall. Orton with a reverse chin lock. Orton with a drop kick to Kennedy for a near fall but Batista breaks up the cover. Kennedy with a belly-to-back suplex and both men are down.
Rhodes and Cena tag in and Cena with the flying shoulder tackles and then he hits the Blue Thunder Bomb. Porter tags in and it is time for a double barreled Five Knuckle Shuffle and Ballin Elbow. Lawler with a vintage punch to Miz. Porter with the Playmaker on Rhodes for the three count.
Winners: John Cena, Montel Vontavious Porter, Ken Kennedy, Batista, and Jerry Lawler
After the match
DiBiase hits the Million Dollar Dream Slam on Porter. Kennedy with the Mic Check to DiBiase. Orton with an RKO to Kennedy. Show and Batista with a double suplex to Show. We go to credits.