Travicity
02-07-2011, 11:42 PM
Fast and the Courteous: The Best Wheelmen of Movies and TV
Hop in and buckle up, but slide the hell out of the driver's seat! You're just a passenger on UGO's list of Everyone's Favorite Movie/TV Fictional Drivers.
16
Kato
Behind the Wheel: Bruce Lee / Jay Chou of The Green Hornet
Driver?! Hell, Kato does all the work! Going mainly by the 2011 release, Kato not only designs and implements the merciless death-mobile that is the Black Beauty, but provides the muscle behind the operation as well being a veritable swiss-army knife of human skill.
15
Happy Hogan
Behind the Wheel: Jon Favreau of Iron Man
Poor Happy Hogan of the Iron Man films doesn't seem to get any love from Pepper Potts as in the comics, but you've got to give it the movie's director for elevating Happy far beyond a simple driver, as an occasional racing partner who more than holds his own in a fight against Justin Hammer's men.
And why we're still not sure why no one simply shot Whiplash, we appreciate Happy's vehicular manslaughter attempts.
14
Benny the Cab
Behind the Wheel: Charles Fleischer of Who Framed Roger Rabbit?
Disconcerting as it might look, you'd love to drive to work every day in a cartoon taxi-cab that screams at everyone it veers past as "Lady." Throw in a manically effeminate rabbit, and you've got yourself quite a drug trip.
In all seriousness, Benny served Eddie and Roger quite well, and we'd entrust our passage to the taxi-toon any day of the week.
13
Matthew Abaddon
Behind the Wheel: Lance Reddick of LOST
We may not have been exactly certain what Matthew Abaddon did for Mr. Widmore, alluding to him simply "getting people where they need to go," but unanswered questions that didn't stop our appreciation for the enigmatic chauffeur recruiter one bit.
Unfortunately, we lost Mr. Betham's driver far too soon to sniper fire, and Lance Reddick moved onto a better life on Fringe. Godspeed, mystery man.
12
Otto Mann
Behind the Wheel: Harry Shearer of The Simpsons
We all wished our bus driver was this cool. Then again, the students of Springfield Elementary probably wished their morning driver wasn't a burned out junkie musician who kept headphones on rather than keep actively alert on the roads.
Cool is cool, kids.
11
Ranjit Singh
Behind the Wheel: Marshall Manesh of How I Met Your Mother
Consistently re-occurring throughout the series, we just had to include Ranjit, the affable Bangladesh driver, who courteously pops up to deliver advice or give a free ride now and again. He even drove Marshall and Lily after the wedding!
Though like everything else over six seasons, he seems to have nothing to do with how anyone met anyone's mother.
10
Speed Racer
Behind the Wheel: Various actors / Emile Hirsch of Speed Racer
Speed would have to be an excellent driver. Not just for consistently winning races with a super-charged Mach Five mind you, but rather for evading all the absurd traps other racers throw at him, and consistently not killing any young boys or monkeys stowed away in the trunk.
9
Argyle
Behind the Wheel: De'Voreaux White of Die Hard
Where would the heroic John McClane be, if not for sassy limo driver Argyle? He wouldn't even have made it to the Nakatomi towers, and poor Holly would be left to fend off the terrorists for himself, and even Theo would have escaped!
And were it not for the ever-cool Argyle, McClane might have only seen action inside an airport, which is completely ridicul... oh.
8
Max Durocher
Behind the Wheel: Jamie Foxx of Collateral
It started like any other night, but aspiring limo-owner cabbie Max Durocher comes into his own over the course of one-adrenaline fueled ride with hitman Vincent, who spurs Max not only to impersonate a hitman, but take a stand and crash his own vehicle to derail the scheme.
Throw in the fact that he bagged Jada Pinkett-Smith and killed Tom Cruise in one night? Max Durocher is our hero.
7
The Dukes of Hazzard
Behind the Wheel: John Schneider and Tom Wopat of The Dukes of Hazzard
Forget all about the Duke boys' replacement "cousins," Johnny Knoxville or Seann William Scott. the original good ol' boys would fly the General Lee off every ramp in Hazzard county, ever eluding Sheriff Coltrane and Boss Hogg, and rarely put a single scratch on that charming ol' charger.
6
Hoke Colburn
Behind the Wheel: Morgan Freeman of Driving Miss Daisy
If Morgan Freeman was our driver, we'd never get anywhere. Not because Hoke Colburn lacked for chauffering talents mind you, more that we'd continually pay him to keep driving beyond the destination narrating things he sees, rather than hurl racial insults his way.
Looking at you, Miss Daisy.
5
Elwood Blues
Behind the Wheel: Dan Aykroyd of The Blues Brothers
Say what you will about the music or the 2000 sequel, but you can't argue that that man can drive! Expertly navigating either freeways or shopping malls, Elwood can destroy the entire vehicular police force with nothing but a run down cruiser of his own, and that's not even counting how much band/equipment fits in there.
4
James Bond
Behind the Wheel: Any James Bond
Whether lying in the backseat operating a BMW via phone, or sticking an assault rifle out of a battered Aston Martin, one prerequisite of being a Bond is an impeccable ability to drive, and ultimately destroy the vehicle in spite of your impressive skills.
3
Dominic Toretto
Behind the Wheel: Vin Diesel of The Fast and the Furious Franchise
There's no doubt that Dominic Toretto puts the pedal to the metal as the best driver of the Fast and Furious franchise, excellent compensation for the fact that Vin Diesel presumably weighs two metric tons.
Whether effortlessly winning street races, swerving under trucks or any of the high-speed chicanery that we'll come to see in Fast Five, Dom's the bomb.
2
Frank Bullitt
Behind the Wheel: Steve McQueen of Bullitt
Good lord, just listen to the engines purr. Gunning it after the two hitmen who tailed him, Bullitt expertly weaves in and out of San Francisco traffic and dipping streets, losing about twenty hubcaps in the process but ultimately besting the men with his superior manueverabliity.
Seriously. Engines. Purr.
1
Frank Martin
Behind the Wheel: Jason Statham of The Transporter
He's courteous, he's thorough, well, dressed, follows a strict set of rules and adheres to brand loyalty. What more need be said of The Transporter's Frank Martin, the best in the biz on four wheels?
If there's an Audi to be relentlessly abused, young women to protect, and heads to be shaven, Frank Martin's your man.
Hop in and buckle up, but slide the hell out of the driver's seat! You're just a passenger on UGO's list of Everyone's Favorite Movie/TV Fictional Drivers.
16
Kato
Behind the Wheel: Bruce Lee / Jay Chou of The Green Hornet
Driver?! Hell, Kato does all the work! Going mainly by the 2011 release, Kato not only designs and implements the merciless death-mobile that is the Black Beauty, but provides the muscle behind the operation as well being a veritable swiss-army knife of human skill.
15
Happy Hogan
Behind the Wheel: Jon Favreau of Iron Man
Poor Happy Hogan of the Iron Man films doesn't seem to get any love from Pepper Potts as in the comics, but you've got to give it the movie's director for elevating Happy far beyond a simple driver, as an occasional racing partner who more than holds his own in a fight against Justin Hammer's men.
And why we're still not sure why no one simply shot Whiplash, we appreciate Happy's vehicular manslaughter attempts.
14
Benny the Cab
Behind the Wheel: Charles Fleischer of Who Framed Roger Rabbit?
Disconcerting as it might look, you'd love to drive to work every day in a cartoon taxi-cab that screams at everyone it veers past as "Lady." Throw in a manically effeminate rabbit, and you've got yourself quite a drug trip.
In all seriousness, Benny served Eddie and Roger quite well, and we'd entrust our passage to the taxi-toon any day of the week.
13
Matthew Abaddon
Behind the Wheel: Lance Reddick of LOST
We may not have been exactly certain what Matthew Abaddon did for Mr. Widmore, alluding to him simply "getting people where they need to go," but unanswered questions that didn't stop our appreciation for the enigmatic chauffeur recruiter one bit.
Unfortunately, we lost Mr. Betham's driver far too soon to sniper fire, and Lance Reddick moved onto a better life on Fringe. Godspeed, mystery man.
12
Otto Mann
Behind the Wheel: Harry Shearer of The Simpsons
We all wished our bus driver was this cool. Then again, the students of Springfield Elementary probably wished their morning driver wasn't a burned out junkie musician who kept headphones on rather than keep actively alert on the roads.
Cool is cool, kids.
11
Ranjit Singh
Behind the Wheel: Marshall Manesh of How I Met Your Mother
Consistently re-occurring throughout the series, we just had to include Ranjit, the affable Bangladesh driver, who courteously pops up to deliver advice or give a free ride now and again. He even drove Marshall and Lily after the wedding!
Though like everything else over six seasons, he seems to have nothing to do with how anyone met anyone's mother.
10
Speed Racer
Behind the Wheel: Various actors / Emile Hirsch of Speed Racer
Speed would have to be an excellent driver. Not just for consistently winning races with a super-charged Mach Five mind you, but rather for evading all the absurd traps other racers throw at him, and consistently not killing any young boys or monkeys stowed away in the trunk.
9
Argyle
Behind the Wheel: De'Voreaux White of Die Hard
Where would the heroic John McClane be, if not for sassy limo driver Argyle? He wouldn't even have made it to the Nakatomi towers, and poor Holly would be left to fend off the terrorists for himself, and even Theo would have escaped!
And were it not for the ever-cool Argyle, McClane might have only seen action inside an airport, which is completely ridicul... oh.
8
Max Durocher
Behind the Wheel: Jamie Foxx of Collateral
It started like any other night, but aspiring limo-owner cabbie Max Durocher comes into his own over the course of one-adrenaline fueled ride with hitman Vincent, who spurs Max not only to impersonate a hitman, but take a stand and crash his own vehicle to derail the scheme.
Throw in the fact that he bagged Jada Pinkett-Smith and killed Tom Cruise in one night? Max Durocher is our hero.
7
The Dukes of Hazzard
Behind the Wheel: John Schneider and Tom Wopat of The Dukes of Hazzard
Forget all about the Duke boys' replacement "cousins," Johnny Knoxville or Seann William Scott. the original good ol' boys would fly the General Lee off every ramp in Hazzard county, ever eluding Sheriff Coltrane and Boss Hogg, and rarely put a single scratch on that charming ol' charger.
6
Hoke Colburn
Behind the Wheel: Morgan Freeman of Driving Miss Daisy
If Morgan Freeman was our driver, we'd never get anywhere. Not because Hoke Colburn lacked for chauffering talents mind you, more that we'd continually pay him to keep driving beyond the destination narrating things he sees, rather than hurl racial insults his way.
Looking at you, Miss Daisy.
5
Elwood Blues
Behind the Wheel: Dan Aykroyd of The Blues Brothers
Say what you will about the music or the 2000 sequel, but you can't argue that that man can drive! Expertly navigating either freeways or shopping malls, Elwood can destroy the entire vehicular police force with nothing but a run down cruiser of his own, and that's not even counting how much band/equipment fits in there.
4
James Bond
Behind the Wheel: Any James Bond
Whether lying in the backseat operating a BMW via phone, or sticking an assault rifle out of a battered Aston Martin, one prerequisite of being a Bond is an impeccable ability to drive, and ultimately destroy the vehicle in spite of your impressive skills.
3
Dominic Toretto
Behind the Wheel: Vin Diesel of The Fast and the Furious Franchise
There's no doubt that Dominic Toretto puts the pedal to the metal as the best driver of the Fast and Furious franchise, excellent compensation for the fact that Vin Diesel presumably weighs two metric tons.
Whether effortlessly winning street races, swerving under trucks or any of the high-speed chicanery that we'll come to see in Fast Five, Dom's the bomb.
2
Frank Bullitt
Behind the Wheel: Steve McQueen of Bullitt
Good lord, just listen to the engines purr. Gunning it after the two hitmen who tailed him, Bullitt expertly weaves in and out of San Francisco traffic and dipping streets, losing about twenty hubcaps in the process but ultimately besting the men with his superior manueverabliity.
Seriously. Engines. Purr.
1
Frank Martin
Behind the Wheel: Jason Statham of The Transporter
He's courteous, he's thorough, well, dressed, follows a strict set of rules and adheres to brand loyalty. What more need be said of The Transporter's Frank Martin, the best in the biz on four wheels?
If there's an Audi to be relentlessly abused, young women to protect, and heads to be shaven, Frank Martin's your man.