Chinese Officials Probe Anuses of 10,000 Pigeons for Bombs

[Jess]

Perhaps you just can never be too sure when it comes to public safety, even if it sounds absolutely ridiculous. However, getting into where the sun doesn’t shine of our fair-feathered friends may be going a tad bit too far.

Officials in mainland China searched through the bottoms of 10,000 pigeons for bombs in preparation for the celebration of National Day in Tiananmen Square. Most people worry about pigeons dropping a different kind of bomb on their cars and even their persons, but these officials seem to have taken the “bomb” part a bit too literally.

It’s one thing to conduct a cavity search on suspicious persons, but it’s another to do so with birds in fear of them being inadvertent suicide bombers. In this case, they were wary of separatist attacks in Beijing and were checking out every possibility, even the downright absurd.

They also checked their feathers and legs to be thoroughly sure that the pigeons that were to be released during the festivities wouldn’t be of any potential terrorist threat. Despite how far-fetched their reasons may have been, it seems that the officials do have a legitimate reason to be paranoid.

The Uyghurs, also known as the Hui, are the predominantly Muslim minority in China who have long sought greater autonomy. There have been an increasing number of attacks and acts of violence from Uyghur separatist groups in recent years, which has led officials to believe that a trojan pigeon attack may not be far from reality.

For the sake of both the people and the pigeons, may a suicide pigeon bomb attack never happen in China or anywhere else.

[the madscotsman]

Pigeons have been shite bombing people for years, maybe it was practice.