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  1. #1
    100% GOONER AFC1986's Avatar
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    Default TNA iMPACT Results - March 1, 2007

    Credit: PWTorch.com

    We open with Jeremy Borash with Christian Cage and Tomko backstage. Tomko was dressed to wrestle. Before Tomko could start his promo, Christian cut him off and told Tomko he has a great opportunity to take out Samoa Joe tonight. Christian said they could bond like father and son - maybe enjoy a ballgame and share some Dodger Dogs. Tomko said htere's nothing in it for him to take out Joe. Christian said his incentive is that he'll give him an NWA Title shot after he takes out Joe. Tomko left and Christian whispered to Borash, "So damn selfish. I wonder where he got that from." And our stage is set.

    After the usual intro aired, Mike Tenay discussed a six-way X Division match and Joe-Tomko tonight. We saw footage from 8:35 p.m. EST before the show started with Kurt Angle and Scott Steiner trying to tear each other apart. West then screamed at the viewers about what happened earlier. Tenay said something was happening in Cornette's office.

    Kurt Angle and Jim Cornette had their weekly therapy session in his office, with Leticia holding the mic. Angle said what Scott Steiner did to him last week was uncalled for. Cornette screamed at Angle not to screw up his TV show after all the favors he's done for him. Angle said he would do what he has to do.

    Random X Division men came to the ring for a six-man tag match. Shelley handed a DVD to Tenay and West before handing off his camera to So Cal Val. The faces came out, then Kevin Nash and Sonjay Dutt came to ringside and asked Lethal to do a Randy Savage impersonation. Lethal did his intro, then the heels jumped him to start the match.

    1 -- SENSHI & JERRY LYNN & JAY LETHAL vs. AUSTIN STARR & ALEX SHELLEY & X Division champion CHRIS SABIN

    The face team recovered quickly and scored with a three-person highspot from the ring to the floor. Bob Backlund then came to ringside before they cut to a break.

    [Commercial Break]

    Backlund was on commentary as Starr isolated Lethal in the heel corner. Shelley and Sabin hooked up on a sweet Muta Lock and double foot kick to the face combination spot on Lethal. As if we need a third person screaming on this show, Backlund kept screaming at Tenay and West. Meanwhile, there was a match in the ring and the camera kept focusing on Backlund. Do we need any more examples of TNA trying to bury the X Division? Senshi took a hot tag and landed a hard chop to the chest on Starr. He then landed combo kicks on Shelley. Starr accepted a series of stiff kicks from Senshi, but Sabin caught him from behind with the Cradle Shock. Lynn prevented a pin attempt by Sabin, then Lynn hit the TKO out of the fireman's carry position. Backlund left the broadcast table to check on Senshi. Meanwhile, Starr gave Lethal a brainbuster suplex and talked trash. Backlund then grabbed Starr by the foot and shoved him into the ring where Lethal rolled him up from behind and used a bridge pin to win. Afterward, Backlund chased Starr from the ring and extended a hand to Senshi, who turned him down with a bow.

    WINNERS: Senshi & Lethal & Lynn in 8:00. Plenty of action to start the show, but, as usual, way too much happening at once. (*3/4)

    [Q2]

    They plugged this month's text-messaging feature on whether Rhino or A.J. Styles would take the plunge on the Elevation X.

    We saw a video package on the Sad Day in the Life of Eric Young. Young arrived at the hotel, balanced Robert Roode's luggage up eighteen floors on the elevator, then arrived at Roode Inc.'s hotel room where Roode and Ms. Brooks gave Young his instructions for the day. Roode spilled some popcorn on the floor and told Young to vacuum. Young said his friend told him he doesn't have to do this. Roode then reminded him that he signed a contract.

    [Commercial Break]

    Sting did another pre-tape interview from a casket. He asked Abyss how he sees life after death. Sting said Abyss only has a few more days left to ponder. "At Destination X, Abyss, you will die," Sting said. He told Abyss not to choose death six feet under, but to choose the light with a new slate.

    Borash found Abyss backstage looking at a picture of James Mitchell. A boom mic entered the shot, then Abyss grabbed the man holding the boom and threw him against the wall.

    Scott Steiner came out to the ring flexing. Kurt Angle then jumped him from behind and landed hard blows. The X Division faces hit the ring and tried to pull Angle away from Steiner. Cornette held back Angle while Steiner entered the ring for an apparent wrestling match.

    2 -- SCOTT STEINER vs. CHASE STEVENS

    Steiner then blindsided Stevens and put him up top. He gave him a top rope belly-to-belly suplex and covered him for the win.

    Steiner then left the ring and grabbed a mic. He said the next time he's in the ring with Angle, he's going to leave him in a pool of his own blood. Steiner said he embarrassed Angle last week, but most importantly, he embarrassed him in front of his family. "Oh, it's getting personal now," Tenay interjected. Steiner said Angle's wife told him Angle's not half the man he is. Angle had enough and jumped Steiner from off camera. They continued to brawl while security and random X Division men tried to separate them. Cornette had enough and screamed at Angle that the whole show doesn't revolve around him. Angle then dropped Cornette on the mat and put him in the Anklelock. The wrestlers stopped Angle, then Cornette got up and ripped off his jacket. He reminded Angle that he's his best friend in the company because he knows Angle means box office. He reminded Angle that everyone else in the company wants to cut his nuts off to get his spot. Cornette then ejected Angle from the building. More security spilled into the ring to take Angle away. Of course, the big question is where's Shane Douglas to get himself over?

    WINNER: Steiner in 0:30. They're going to have to keep Angle-Steiner short at the PPV since it doesn't appear that Steiner is in wrestling shape. It's hard to get a read after a thirty-second match, but they're going to have to depend on stunts and bag-of-tricks at the PPV. (n/a)

    [Q3]

    [Commercial Break]

    Tenay and West screamed at the camera in reaction to Cornette giving Angle the boot. We saw footage from during the commercial break when Don Harris forced Angle to leave the building. Angle cursed Harris and the X Division wrestlers on the way out of the building.

    Leticia did a sit-down interview with "the Pirate" Chris Harris. Harris said the doctors haven't cleared him to wrestle with limited vision in his right eye. He said James Storm needs to be looking over his shoulder everywhere he goes.

    Alex Shelley returned to ringside and introduced his new Paparazzi Productions called Massacre: New York. We saw footage of LAX entering a random wrestling office before beatind down Johnny Rodz. Homicide pulled down a photo of a very young Devon in a classic wrestler pose and shoved it in Rodz's face. Back live, Tenay let us know that Rodz trained Devon. Shelley then asked for his film stars to come down and accept congratulations, but Brother Ray cut him off. Ray said he would throw up on Shelley and beat him down. Yes, he said he would throw up on Shelley. He said that footage made him sick. Ray then slapped the mic out of Shelley's hand and gave us a brief look at Rodz - the man, the myth, and the legend. Ray asked Shelley why he would hold the camera for something like that and asked whether they had heat even though they don't even know each other. Kevin Nash then walked to ringside and Ray told him that there's no issue between them; the issue is between him and Nash's butt buddy, Shelley. LAX then jumped Ray from behind. Ray fought them off since he's Brother Ray, then Shelley caught him from behind with a low blow. Tenay then told us that Devon is back in New York tending to Rodz, so Ray is all alone. LAX then beat down Ray before Konnan appeared on the stage and screamed, "LAX, get the tables." Hernandez set up a table in the ring and dumped Ray through the table. LAX's music hit, then they left the ring before security returned to the ring to check on Ray.

    [Commercial Break]

    [Q4]

    We have Breaking News from the set of Rambuck Killings. Apparently, Killings was fired...er...injured on the set and the project has been suspended indefinitely. I'm not seeing the point in this.

    Borash was backstage to plug the Destination X PPV before welcoming Samoa Joe to the interview position. Joe said all the sacrifice and suffering culminates at Destination X when he takes the NWA Title away from Christian. He said tonight, Tomko pays for the sins of his father. Forget about Joe, let's find out what Abyss is up to. Off camera, Abyss was choking out someone, then Joe grabbed Abyss and threw him against a wall. He told Abyss he could continue to be a puppet or get over it and be a man for once.

    3 -- TOMKO vs. SAMOA JOE

    Backstage, we saw the way-too-casually-dressed-for-a-champion Christian Cage toss a cordless phone aside and smirk at the TV monitor. Back in the ring, Tomko jumpstarted the match by landing forearm blows on Joe. They had a brief exchange before Tomko knocked him down with a big boot. Joe then clotheslined Tomko over the top rope to the floor. Joe then landed a suicide dive with an elbow smash. We saw Christian Cage leaving his locker room, presumably heading for the ring.

    [Commercial Break]

    Back from the break, Tomko had Joe in a sleeper hold. Joe fought out, then ran into a lift-up slam for a nearfall. Tomko applied a neck vice, but Joe fought out again and hit a snap powerslam for a nearfall. Joe went for the Muscle buster, but Christian slipped into the ring and landed a chair shot after the referee distracted himself. Tomko then hit a running clothesline for the pin and the win. The fans in the front row shook their heads in collective disbelief.

    Afterward, Christian screamed at the announcers, then he returned to the ring with the title belt. Joe stole the belt, though, and smashed it over Tomko's face. He then put Christian in a rear naked choke before Scott Steiner hit the ring and jumped Joe. They beat down Joe before Christian gave him the Unprettier. Abyss's music hit, then Abyss cleared the heels from the ring. Everyone stood their ground, then Joe slowly got up, which led to Abyss hitting the Black Hole Slam. Tenay, surprised, said they never expected that. Why? He did that Sting at least twice and Joe just shoved him against a wall backstage. TNA's scripting of the announcers makes it seem like they have no common sense or awareness of what's going on. We close the show with Christian smiling with his cronies ringside.

    WINNER: Tomko in 7:00. You really don't get a sense that Joe is challenging for the NWA Title in 10 days. We know he's challenging for the belt, but they've turned his quest for the title in a secondary story on the show. It doesn't seem like a big deal with Steiner-Angle grabbing the most TV time and Joe losing TV matches. I certainly wouldn't expect Shawn Michaels to lose a TV singles match one week before WrestleMania. (*1/4)

  2. #2
    The Maverick legolas4792's Avatar
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    i loved backlunds commentating

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